The Waste of a Tongue

Thelma was the self-appointed monitor of community morals so it was only natural for her to keep sticking her nose into other people’s business.

Many neighbors hated Thelma’s gossiping ways, but they feared her enough to remain silence.

Thelma made a mistake, however, when she accused a new neighbor, Ted, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon.

She told anyone who would listen: “I know what Ted’s up to! He’s a drunk, that’s what he is. Why else would his  truck be parked outside the tavern all day and night?”

Ted, a man of few words, overheard Thelma, but he said nothing, choosing to walk away. He didn’t explain, defend, or deny.  He said nothing.

Later that evening, Ted quietly parked his pickup in front of Thelma’s house, walked home, and left it there all night…

(Shout out to Wes for sending me the story!)

What does it mean to waste your tongue? Here’s a short list of no-nos you might want to review should you be tempted to use your tongue in ways that bring pain instead of pleasure:

Gossip. Don’t spread it. Don’t listen to it.

Lie. Don’t try to convince others of what you know to be untrue.

Curse. Who the %^&$# needs to say %$#@%@ every other @*%#%^@ word? Unless you’re a sailor, truck driver, rock star, comedian or author, you might consider passing on needless curse words. Leave it to the pros!

Rage. The other day, a car tailgated me while I was putzing around town. I’m convinced the other driver wanted to get close enough to me so I could read his rant in my rear view mirror.  And I’m pretty sure he wasn’t a pro. (He looked more like a lawyer). I wondered if he could read my lips as I mouthed “R U twelve?” Save your raging tongue for those who’ve earned it like criminals, mean people, and politicians.

Foolishness. Have you ever tried to listen to someone who seems entranced by the sound of his or her own voice? It’s hard, isn’t it? Don’t waste your tongue unless you have a point to make. Once you make that point, move the @^$%# on.

Frozen pizza. This might sound tempting…but don’t. Your taste buds may never return. Call 1-800-Lou-ToGo instead. It’s worth the wait.

What would you add?

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